Tuesday, January 7, 2014

January 7, 2004

It almost seems like yesterday that I spoke to a friend of mine while working at the Sheriff's Employee's Benefit Association in San Bernardino, CA.  He and I were once in law school together.  He became a lawyer for a firm in the greater L.A. area while I practiced law as a criminal defense attorney in San Diego.

Eventually I started working for S.E.B.A. - a fancy name for something that is/was actually a labor union.  Great people and a really great job, but not what I wanted for a life as it turned out.  

I had begun to feel that I was missing out and if I didn't get married soon I would not be fit to marry…being 57 then.  You get set in your ways…so, he began to tell me about his joining Match.com and all the dates he had and the lovely vivacious women he met. So I started thinking about that…..

However, when I went on Match.com they matched me up in my area…for people who wanted to DATE.  I did not want to date…and about half the men I saw I knew already…so I decided to answer the call to delve further into the internet love matching and joined eHarmony.  10 years ago today.

Two days later, January 9th, I received my first questionaire from a guy in Idaho to get to know him. That's how eHarmony did it…you are pretty anonymous and they have the questions lined up…you just do a check list on the ones you want to ask.

Two places that interested me were Idaho and Georgia for different reasons.  So, he and I corresponded.  On February 13 he flew into town and I picked him up at the airport in Ontario.  I was so exhausted from working and getting ready for his trip when we met in person for the first time.


 After he registered at his motel we had coffee there and he said to me, "Do you want me to ask you to marry me now, or do you want me to wait until tomorrow?"  :o)  I asked him to wait, which he did.

We visited my family in San Diego, and then come back to San Bernardino.  At our dinner, in Kentucky Fried Chicken, he asked me and I said yes.  We sat and chatted for over two hours and then it dawned on us that the place had closed!  The kids running the restaurant were somewhat gathered in the corner watching us smiling as he and I held hands and talked about marriage and our new upcoming life together.

A memory that will last a lifetime…..a simple day, with simple pleasures….and it turned out it was also his daughter's birthday…Valentines Day, February 14th, 2004.

I flew up to see his place and meet his family the next weekend…and then the next weakend???

We married on February 28, 2004.

So the month of January always brings these overwhelming memories for me of the new life I embarked on, and the all too short marriage to my dear Sid.  We fussed a lot, and I was as hard to live with as he was, so I gave as good as I got…but we had a good marriage, one that could have been better…and lucky for me (VERY lucky for me) I have been accepted by his family and his first wife's family as a sister, aunt and friend.  
Although I do not have his hand to hold any longer, he holds me nonetheless with great care and watches over me through the love of his children…now my children…grandchildren…sister's and in-laws alike.

Who would have thunk it!???

I miss him oh, so very much.

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